Monday, November 22, 2010

home sick

   I've been a mess of emotions lately and it's been extremely hard to deal with because of the fact that I'm not usually like this. I don't know how to cope. Since I broke my arm about a week and a half ago then having to get surgery and what not, I wasn't able to go on a family trip to New York City and Delaware for my cousins wedding. My brothers and dad departed this morning to go soak up some love from the crazy family bunch and to-die-for Italian cooking prepared by my Mom Mom [grandma]. I have been a wreck.
  The reason why I am being such a baby about this whole situation is because being with my huge Italian family is probably just one of the best experiences someone could ever have... AND NYC?! Come on now, that's something no one would ever want to pass up. So, instead of experiencing the big city and being obnoxious with my crazy family members, I'm here... at home.
   When my brothers and dad left, I came to realize how much I depend on them. My brothers and I are ALWAYS entertained by one another and it's not the same without them. I feel so incomplete and lonely. Jake, who is 13 is probably the funniest kid I know. I'm constantly laughing with him and there's never a dull moment! Zach, who is soon to be 15 is super laid back and he's someone who I can just relax and have deep talks with. Both of them have amazing qualities and I couldn't be any prouder to call them MY brothers. They're my true home! Yes, I know...I'm cheesy, but like I always say, It isn't cheesy if you truly mean it! Anyways, I want them to have a spectacular time, but I can't wait until they're home...and I hope my family doesn't forget about me too much!

grandparents!

cousins <3 & brothers

zachy poooo

in delaware climning trees! it's so beautiful up there.


Wednesday, November 17, 2010

my journey

While being a cripple, I've decided to take snapshots of my journey.


Oh you know,  just brushing my teeth..


Beautiful flowers from the boyfriend

 









Dad after the Rock and Roll Marathon!!








I've been living there for the past week...










Smiling after surgery!...?




My friends are the best EVER!

i've had this on for a while.. it's my obsession.

This little boy has kept me laughing and smiling all week :]




TIME TO KILL...








"being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect. it means you have decided to look beyond the imperfections."














Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Obstacles

I've been a crippled slob laying on my forgiving couch every day, all day since Friday November 12. The reason I'm being so unproductive is because I broke my arm. Dislocated it and broke it. The ridiculous thing about this unfortunate event is that I did it in dance! Right before a pep rally. Who would have thought. Well, with my phenomenal luck, the break was so bad that I had to get surgery today. Let me tell you, I was scared out of my mind!! It's all over now thank the lord. This whole experience has been eye opening. I haven't been able to do simple tasks like wash my face, MY HAIR, put in contacts, or bathe. I took my hand/arm for granted. I've been thinking about people who are paralyzed and don't even have arms or legs! I look up to them. Then it made me think about people who are going through things that are way worse than what I'm going through and it made me feel like a spoiled brat. If you're reading this, tie your hands behind your back and try to do everyday tasks. Let me tell you something.. You cant! That's why I have put myself in their shoes and it has made me look at my injury as a minor scrape, or burn.. It's not so bad!
When I broke my arm, I asked myself, "why me?!" and "why now!?" but that's not what I should be asking. Honestly, I should be thanking god because this is going to teach me lessons and open my eyes to other things. I know for a fact this happened for a reason because I've already seen changes in my life in a really good way. I mean, sure there's a negative side to this but I do my best not to think about them. This set back is not really considered a set back, it's more of a go forward. It's brought the people I love closer, and it's shown me how much people care and that's the warmest, fullest,heart felt feeling that I could ever have and I'm so grateful for everyone in my life!

I apologize for my boring set up of a journal, but it's hard to type with one hand!

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Go For It

DENIED.
That word will never be a part of my vocabulary ever again.

  I've lived a week full of obstacles and lessons.



Habitat for Humanity - So rewarding!

  • Following your dreams is the one thing you should never give up
  • Being shot down shouldn't make you shut down, it should influence you to strive for more
 I'm looking out my window to a burst of green and life. This unknown Earth makes me think.
Life will never give you a satisfying answer, but what would be the fun in knowing what everything is about and how everything in the world works? Personally, I don't want to know. Not knowing ervything gives me the motivation to explore and find myself through inspiring people and places. I want to see what the world has to offer for me and as of now, it's been a lot. I'm incredibly blessed! 
Last night I learned something new. Although I may have this definite plan for how my life will work, It won't happen exactly the way I want it as of now. I don't know where life will take me, which is unpleasant and incredibly exciting all at the same time.
Everyone should stop for a moment, and reflect on the life they are living.

"Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for"





Thursday, October 28, 2010

the impact of time


Today I came the realization of something that was inevitable.. and it's what every senior had told me to be ready for.. change. Change in people, change of friends, change of habits, and change of plans. Honestly, It scared me half to death whenever they would tell me the facts and I never listened, which now I regret more than ever. It's mind blowing how you can go from being amazing friends with someone all your life and then you slowly realize that the two of you are going onto different paths which isn't always a good one, I hate to say. Soon after realizing this, I came to an epiphany, which altered my mood. Throughout these changes, what I thought, horrible changes, I have gained new relationships that are better than any kind of relationship I have ever had before. It's truly awe-inspiring how negatives can turn into magnificent effects. I'm so grateful for the life that i have and everyone that has been in and out of it because they've taught me how to love, forgive, forget, and greatest of all.. to live.